I have experienced a great deal through my journey. I have learned some very valuable and hard lessons along the way. My bitterness that came from being ill has faded,and been replaced with since of calm and peacefulness. I know now that those hard lessons were crucial in teaching me what I needed to know and that was HOW TO LIVE.......
We have all heard that we get so busy making a life we fail to live it. I truly know now what that really means. It was my quality of living that I neglected, in truly living a happy and fulfilling life. That's my lesson, I learned to value my life and the gift of my life. My second chance at getting it right! I had to go through those difficulties to get my reward, my peace.
I have become successful at achieving true happiness, peacefulness and fulfillment. I sorted through all my issues figuratively and literally. It was hard and honestly painful sometimes. I had to evaluate myself not the situation. You see... my whole life till now was dealing with situations, not handling my life, when I did that I gave my happiness away to the situation. I expected my husband and material things, my job and money to make me happy.
Happiness started with me. I found and fixed what I had done to myself. I started with small yet significant steps. I learned to forgive myself and love myself and to be proud of what I had accomplished. I stopped blaming and started owning my shit. Therapy and a prayer and and unwavering support from my family and friends made it much easier to change.
Everyday is a new and full promise. I know the concept of achieving happiness sounds silly, perhaps so... I don't need their approval. The only approval I need is my own. I refused to be defeated by negative thoughts and actions. I'm well aware things may go wrong or the day may not unfold as I have wanted, and that's okay because I can handle it. I handle it because I know the problem will resolve and things will continue to go on. Its called faith....Faith in my god, faith in my myself faith in the those around me.
My life is happier because I choose to be happy and thankful for the life I have been given. I don't try to understand those who bring negative to my life, I just remove the negative. It keeps me healthier mentally and physically when I choose to be my own best positive influence. I then surround myself with those whom I love and respect and admire and learned to give all of my heart every time. I surrounded myself with joy. I forgive easier, I learn more, I feel more and I gain such clarity and calmness.
Through struggles I found resilience, through pain I found happiness, through bitterness I found forgiveness and in tithe end I obtained unconditional love from MYSELF!